"Where Can You Buy Shoes Like That?": Me Approaching Men

Yesterday I was waiting for the Metra. I saw this man on the platform who I thought was mildly attractive. I smiled at him to show that I was interested. He smiled back, but I could tell nothing was going to happen on his part. Since I enjoy meeting new people and wanted to have someone to talk to on the train ride home, I initiated the conversation. Too nervous to start out with, “Hi my name is…”, I lied and inquired about his shoes because “I wanted to buy my nephew a pair.” And the conversation went from there...

Yep. That is my love life. When I was younger, it seemed easier to just smile at a man and he would approach me. Nowadays it seems to be working less and less. I personally have no issue with  approaching men. I am assertive with many things in my life. If I want it, I will go get it. However, I think this has worked against me and is one of the reasons for me being single. I want have control and I have also approached men like a job/internship opportunity, being very forward and mentioning my accomplishments. I mean dude asked where I went to school. But of course, as women, we cannot outdo men nor can we be basic, basic bitches. (Please feel my sarcasm.) Men do not like resumes nor do they like open hands.  

I have been told that if a man is interested, he will approach you; men like “the chase” and do not want a woman that is too easy. Why should I be passive just because I am woman? When you do not approach something, you miss opportunities. But if the opportunity if meant to occur, it will occur. But what if the guy is shy or in rare situations (at least for me), is attracted to women that approach him?  

See it’s just confusing.  

So I want to pose a question: Should women approach men? Why or why not? Also, does it make a woman thirsty if she approaches a man?

SH