I honestly cannot stand tweets like this to say the least. The strange thing about it is that I just watched the documentary, Dark Girls, a few days earlier. I am not opposed to people being in interracial relationships; people have preferences. My problem is when people make their dating decisions based on stereotypes. I will not be naive, but admit that black women and girls are capable of having attitudes, especially when men approach them, but are we at fault? Maybe this is a defense mechanism to not wanting pussy hungry men approaching us. Or this is based on our teachings that men like women who play hard to get. Or just, just maybe, this is a form of resistance to the historical sexual exploitation that African and Black women undergone from white slave masters. (Okay I will save that for another post.)
Being aware of the black girl with an attitude stereotype, I do make an effort to smile and engage in conversation with men who approach me and if I am not interested I politely say that. I do not believe I will benefit from being mean and regardless of how "doggish" men are, they still have feelings. Unfortunately, men don't want politeness, they want phone numbers.
Just this past weekend, I was riding the blue line to see my sisters. This old man, at least 60 years, started spitting game at me. He was lacking teeth and I assumed he was drunk. He sat across from me and knowing that he was too old for me, he still felt the need to tell me how beautiful I was with every other sentence. While I do appreciate a sincere compliment, the problem was he went on for several minutes. (Plus, he assumed I had a boyfriend and I am not one for heteronormativity.) He knew he was bothering me because he said, "If I am bothering you, let me know and I will leave you alone." Being the polite and respectful young lady that I am, I said no and continued to endure this geezer hitting on me with an occasional sticking out of his tongue with laughter.
A month or so prior, I experienced something similar with an older man with a lack of teeth while I waiting for the bus. (Men seem to act out on the CTA.) Not only did this man interrupt my reading, but he was persistent in trying to pursue me. The difference with this man was that I blatantly said I was not interested and did not want to give him my number. Somehow, he assumed that since he complimented me (while leering at my legs), that he was entitled to my time. To impress me, he said he went to Harvard. (Then why you bumming it out on Ashland with some slippers?) Offended, he said, “If I was driving in my truck you would talk to me.” Maybe if I was 14 years old and basic. He asked me to give him my number three times and all three times I said, “No thank you.” Because he did not interpret my short, dry answers of disinterest, I stopped responding to him altogether and proceeded to reading my book. I felt so wrong for ignoring an elder.
Then the ultimate, the worse situation I have been in was a this past Fall. I was leaving a party with my line sister and we were transferring from the blue to the red line. In the underground tunnel, a man said something and not wanting to ignore him, I greeted him. I guess he thought I liked him because after my LS and I took our seats, he popped up and sat across from us. He started asking about where we came from and our party habits, do we drink, smoke, etc. Knowing good and well I enjoy social drinking, I told him my LS and I were too classy for that. He kept asking similar questions (maybe he wanted a different answer) and I gave him the same response. When he finally got around to asking my name, I was tired of talking and felt this was a pointless conversation (I am not an evening person.) I responded, "I don't have a name." I heard of those guys who cursed out females when they felt salty about being rejected, but I did not know this was real life. He said he was sorry for stepping on my red carpet. Confused, I looked at the floor. I thought he was trying to talk about my cute red pumps. He started to curse me out, saying I was a bitch, how stuck up I was, etc. Then he walked to the other end of the cart and continued to curse me out as he left the train. I was scared he was going to physically harm me, but after he left, my LS and I started laughing. So you mad bruh?
So no motherfucker, not all black girls have fucking attitudes.
SH
No comments:
Post a Comment